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Narcissism in the context of divorce: How to divorce a narcissist

As you age alongside your spouse, you may soon come to find that this person wasn't who they used to be. While people often change, this can lead to a divorce in many cases.

If you decide to push forward with a divorce, you should prepare for a variety of challenges. Furthermore, if you're divorcing a narcissist, the process is rarely simple.

Here are five tips to keep in mind when divorcing a narcissist:

  • Know what you're up against: It's pretty easy to tell if your soon-to-be ex-spouse is a narcissist. If this person is always talking about themselves and unwilling to accept any responsibility, there's a good chance he or she is a narcissist.
  • Don't continue the fight: The problem with a narcissist is that, no matter what you say, you won't be able to get your point across. So, rather than continue down this path, take a step back and save your breath for the conversations that really matter. For example, wait until mediation to begin hashing out the details of your divorce.
  • Understand the challenges that await: For example, if you have children with this person, you must know how their personality will impact child custody, visitation and other related details.
  • Document everything: This is a general rule of thumb for anyone going through a divorce. When you document everything, you won't be caught off guard in the future.
  • Don't blame yourself: Maybe the person had narcissistic tendencies when you tied the knot. Or maybe this has become a bigger problem as of late. Regardless, you shouldn't place too much blame on yourself. There's nothing wrong with holding yourself accountable, but you don't have any control over the person's personality.

Divorcing a narcissist can be full of many twists and turns, all of which are sure to cause you more frustration and stress. When you have a plan in place for dealing with a narcissistic personality, it's easier to keep your cool as you move through the divorce process.

What matters most is that you maintain your health, understand your legal rights and do what's best for you. Your narcissistic spouse will be an ex-spouse soon enough, so it's time to focus on yourself.

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